• Maverick Lumen

Kink: A Vulnerable, Connecting, and Healing Process

Updated: Mar 28, 2020

I wrote an article for LooseLips Magazine about my relationship with Kink and how it is a part of my healing journey. It was published just in time for Valentine's Day! While February 14th can place pressure on us to do extra for our partners if we are in relationships, or find someone if we are single; we don't have to follow the set script put forward by society in regards to our lives. We don't have to follow a "vanilla" relationship structure. Let's stop making assumptions about how sex and romance are going to flow between us and our partners, and actively have conversations about how we want to experience each other and pleasure. And if you also want to learn how to be responsible and safe with Kink and the edgier types of play that can occur, give it a read. It's a great introductory piece on how to start incorporating some of these foundational aspects of Kink.


Here's a short Twitter thread that @AskASub wrote that perfectly illustrates what "vanilla" is.

It's not an issue of "missionary and no missionary, it's an issue of consent and prior negotiation."
AskASub Thread Part 1
AskASub Thread Part 2
AskASub Thread Part 3

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I acknowledge that I am breathing, practicing, and enjoying the traditional unceded territory of the səl̓ilwətaɁɬ təməxʷ (Tsleil-Waututh), Skwxwú7mesh-ulh Temíx̱w (Squamish), S’ólh Téméxw (Stó:lō), Stz'uminus, and šxʷməθkʷəy̓əm  (Musqueam) peoples, otherwise known as Burnaby, BC.

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